Having the Emotional Resilience to Press Forward

Posted November 06, 2009 in College Chronicles, News by Heather Cavalli | Comment

It’s been a watershed week for many seniors - some have put to bed the bulk of their application process with a November 1 deadline, while others found themselves with a Tuesday workout because they hadn’t yet gotten all of their teacher recommendation requests. Most seniors find themselves in the middle - realizing that the stage for drafts is quickly passing them by, final exams are around the corner, “Can I do it?” the whispered mantra slowly chipping away confidence. During Wednesday’s partnership meeting Mr. Rigney reminded the seniors of what they learned during Judgment Day - the basic ideas were: we work hard, we don’t make excuses for ourselves or others and we have the ability to be tougher than we think. Then he divided the room into two groups - who feels they are meeting their obligations, and who feels they are not? It was surprising to see those who are overly judgmental of themselves and also those whose vision of their best lacks clarity. Then Mr. Rigney turned the attention to seniors in the college process and connected the theme of the day to the actions that will help seniors arrive at their future step. The meeting ended with two students examples from both ends of the spectrum. First, the group heard from two students who have pushed themselves in the college process and then two students who are finding themselves falling behind. For those who have attacked their college process with gusto, their basic message was “this is what I want, that’s why I work hard for it.” Those who spoke about what is getting in their way realized that they were letting short term priorities cloud their commitment to their vision of their future. The vision of their future is cloudy and hard to commit to.

For some students, it is a scary, scary thing to think of a world without the support and structure here at Hyde - so much so that the very idea of moving forward in the college process is paralyzing. We know this and part of the senior year process it to help seniors recognize the power they have within themselves to push through - they are stronger than they believe they are and have the ability to be tougher than they think. Don’t make excuses - do what you know you need to do and know that you can do it.

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About the Author

heathercavalli

Heather Cavalli, a native of New York City, is no stranger to boarding schools. She graduated from Watertown, Connecticut’s Taft School in 1986. After two years at Kenyon College, she finished her bachelor degree at Barnard College, Columbia University, in 1990. After three years in Italy, she did graduate work at Brandeis University and was awarded a master's degree in Comparative History. Before coming to Hyde in 2001, Heather taught at a private girls school in Miami, Florida. Presently Director of the College Office, Heather has also taught history and was Woodstock’s Director of Studies. Heather met her husband Massimo in Italy. They have two children, Francesca, 12, and Luca, 10. Heather loves her job. “This is the most fun academic professional experience I have ever had, and I had a lot of fun teaching history. What’s really great about this job is that I profit from everyone’s hard work, and get to see students connect with their unique potential and all the possibilities about their future.”

3 Responses to “Having the Emotional Resilience to Press Forward”

  1. Dr Laraine says:

    When I come across an expression of such wise counsel, it’s hard not to chime in about what a gift the students are being offered. Doing group and individual exercises to help students clarify their own understanding of their goals and dreams is too often given short shrift in the schedule. What a resilience and confidence builder! Your students may realize years later how having connections with good mentors enables success. If you’re interested, there is an article on resilience and connections at http://educanopy.com/blog/194/making-connections-and-resilience/. Who we choose for our mentors, peers, and friends makes such a difference in achieving those goals and dreams. I am putting Hyde on my resource list.

  2. heathercavalli Heather Cavalli says:

    Thank you Dr. Laraine - I’m thrilled you enjoyed my post.

  3. Linda McGuire says:

    Resilience is what it is all about…


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